Yes, you over there!
Stop teaching!
No, I don’t mean get a new job.
What I am talking about is teaching 24/7.
You know the ones, you know who they are.
The ones who claim that they don't have a job; they have a calling?
Those people who say that “Teaching is my life!” who often have a zealot’s gleam in their eye that make me want to slink away to the hors d'oeuvre table at a party?
When you leave the school, stop teaching.
It’s like that joke about the two women discussing their love lives.
First woman: I broke up with my optometrist boyfriend.
Second woman: Why? I thought you were crazy about him!
First woman: I know, he’s a great guy, we have a lot of the same interests, and he’s really a kind person. He's just really irritating in bed.
Second woman: Huh?
First woman: Yeah. He was always saying, "So do you like it better like this... or like this? Like this... or like this?"
Just like our optometrist friend, there are times when we get so wrapped up with our jobs that our lives can go sideways.
For lots of teachers, when they are at school, they are thinking about home life, and when they are at home, they are thinking about their job at school.
Either way, it’s avoidance and unhealthy.
It’s best to give 100% to whichever personal or professional arena we are occupying at any given time and then sign off when we are done.
We (and the people we associate with in and out of school) will be happier with our outlook if we can find the on/off button in our teacher psyche and turn it off when we are not in the classroom.
A couple of places where we should definitely stop teaching:
On a date – a big buzzkill.
On a gig – a bigger buzzkill.
In a principal’s office – Don’t be that music teacher who is going to impart their “Mr. Holland-esqu” knowledge and philosophy on your boss. Don't hold back because they have bigger fish to fry but because they're hunting whales with harpoons. Your plea has the aroma of a bucket of chum, and you'll be putting a bull's eye right next to your blow hole. You’ll only tic them off. Better to go out for a few beers after work and share some self-deprecating gig stories to humanize yourself.
At an open mic – I love when the spoken intro a singer-songwriter gives for their song is longer than the song itself. Stop teaching, start playing.
At a school concert – There was only one Lenny and only one “Young People’s Concerts” and neither of us will ever approach his talent, grace, and technique – so don’t even bother. The parents came to hear their kids, not you. Keep your intros and outros short and try not to make speeches. If you insist in teaching the audience, you will have more than a few frowning parents agreeing with their kids that you talk too much.
At a family holiday dinner – I know you may only be a nephew, but if you talk enough crazy talk at a holiday dinner, you will become the crazy uncle, whether or not you have nephews or nieces. Save it for the Fox and MSNBC message boards. And don’t spill the cranberry sauce. I hear it stains.
In front of an angry person – Really? You wanna teach the guy who is yelling and spraying spittle? That’s like trying to teach the kid who’s yelling or the parent who’s yelling or ANYBODY who’s yelling. It never ends well. And then there's that whole spittle thing.
At happy hour – When I drink, I don’t want to be instructed in ANYTHING or discuss any kids other than you progeny or mine.
At a party – There is a reason they call it a “party”. If they wanted you to teach, they would call it “a boring”.
Stop teaching!
No, I don’t mean get a new job.
What I am talking about is teaching 24/7.
You know the ones, you know who they are.
The ones who claim that they don't have a job; they have a calling?
Those people who say that “Teaching is my life!” who often have a zealot’s gleam in their eye that make me want to slink away to the hors d'oeuvre table at a party?
When you leave the school, stop teaching.
It’s like that joke about the two women discussing their love lives.
First woman: I broke up with my optometrist boyfriend.
Second woman: Why? I thought you were crazy about him!
First woman: I know, he’s a great guy, we have a lot of the same interests, and he’s really a kind person. He's just really irritating in bed.
Second woman: Huh?
First woman: Yeah. He was always saying, "So do you like it better like this... or like this? Like this... or like this?"
Just like our optometrist friend, there are times when we get so wrapped up with our jobs that our lives can go sideways.
For lots of teachers, when they are at school, they are thinking about home life, and when they are at home, they are thinking about their job at school.
Either way, it’s avoidance and unhealthy.
It’s best to give 100% to whichever personal or professional arena we are occupying at any given time and then sign off when we are done.
We (and the people we associate with in and out of school) will be happier with our outlook if we can find the on/off button in our teacher psyche and turn it off when we are not in the classroom.
A couple of places where we should definitely stop teaching:
On a date – a big buzzkill.
On a gig – a bigger buzzkill.
In a principal’s office – Don’t be that music teacher who is going to impart their “Mr. Holland-esqu” knowledge and philosophy on your boss. Don't hold back because they have bigger fish to fry but because they're hunting whales with harpoons. Your plea has the aroma of a bucket of chum, and you'll be putting a bull's eye right next to your blow hole. You’ll only tic them off. Better to go out for a few beers after work and share some self-deprecating gig stories to humanize yourself.
At an open mic – I love when the spoken intro a singer-songwriter gives for their song is longer than the song itself. Stop teaching, start playing.
At a school concert – There was only one Lenny and only one “Young People’s Concerts” and neither of us will ever approach his talent, grace, and technique – so don’t even bother. The parents came to hear their kids, not you. Keep your intros and outros short and try not to make speeches. If you insist in teaching the audience, you will have more than a few frowning parents agreeing with their kids that you talk too much.
At a family holiday dinner – I know you may only be a nephew, but if you talk enough crazy talk at a holiday dinner, you will become the crazy uncle, whether or not you have nephews or nieces. Save it for the Fox and MSNBC message boards. And don’t spill the cranberry sauce. I hear it stains.
In front of an angry person – Really? You wanna teach the guy who is yelling and spraying spittle? That’s like trying to teach the kid who’s yelling or the parent who’s yelling or ANYBODY who’s yelling. It never ends well. And then there's that whole spittle thing.
At happy hour – When I drink, I don’t want to be instructed in ANYTHING or discuss any kids other than you progeny or mine.
At a party – There is a reason they call it a “party”. If they wanted you to teach, they would call it “a boring”.
The cleverest two things you can do at most of the above settings is smile and listen . . . . which just so happen to be two of the the traits of great teachers!
RSS Feed